Look At Me
by SeasonsOfTime
Summary: Regina Mills is Snow White's biological mother, but she gave her up for adoption after she was born. Twelve years later, Regina saves Snow's life, and they form something like a friendship, but when Snow shares a certain secret, their already tense relationship becomes even more complicated for both of them.
1. Chapter 1:Slip your secrets into Castles

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Once Upon a Time_ or any of its characters. **

**Chapter One **

A small hand reached up to grab Regina's face, pawing at her chin like a kitten. She touched the small fingers, cherishing them, her large hand cupping over the child's small one.

Regina's eyes were locked on her newborn's. It was impossible to describe the connection that passed between their eyes like a two-way umbilical cord, feeding them both each other's comfort.

And though Regina looked repeatedly from large innocent eye to large innocent eye, she knew, that there would never be enough time to fully understand them, or to fill those eyes with the knowledge and comfort that only a mother could.

The blue fairy, shuffled and rose from her spot on the floor, causing Regina to look up, breaking the eye contact with her baby. The blue fairy fluttered before her, and the coldness of the cave came back to Regina, seemingly slamming against her skin.

"My work here is done," The blue fairy said. "I have mended you so that you will not die, and I have successfully delivered your child." She smiled in satisfaction at herself, and gestured at Regina's baby with her wand.

"Thank you," Regina said, careful to only make brief eye contact with the blue fairy, before lowering her gaze back to her child. Seeing the baby allowed her to smile, which she hoped passed for gratitude. The blue fairy had successfully delivered her child, but she had also intentionally done nothing to ease her pain, (a fairy in a hospital would have). The blue fairy thought the pain was only fair punishment for what Regina had done. Regina thought what was happening was enough punishment without the added physical pain, she had never liked the blue fairy anyway, always flying around on her self-righteous glittering wings...

Daniel, who hadn't just spent the last eleven hours pushing what felt like a giant boulder through a needle sized hole, was perfectly able to express his sincere gratitude with a smile and a wave and an enthusiastic: "Thank you!"

If Regina's eyes weren't so tired she probably would have rolled them.

With a final flourish of her small body, the blue fairy whizzed away into the mid-January snow falling around their cave.

Regina became aware of Daniel's hands on her shoulders. "It's time."

Regina couldn't suppress the instinctive resentment that rose inside of her toward anyone that attempted to cut short her time with her child.

"Can you stand?" He asked.

Regina looked down at the baby, and rearranged the blanket that was wrapped around her so that it covered her small exposed shoulder.

"Help me too," she said. Regina was fiercely independent to the point where someone holding the door for her could annoy her, but the baby had left her body feeling aching and empty and vulnerable. So she allowed Daniel to help her to her feet.

Outside of the cave, the snow fell heavily, touching her baby's face. Regina was reluctant to wrap the cloak around herself and the baby, and hide her precious face from view, but the falling snow gave her no other option. She needed to keep her baby as warm as possible.

She climbed inside the awaiting carriage, but Daniel stayed outside to drive the horses. The horses were his, but the carriage was courtesy of the blue fairy, it would also disappear in less than four hours, the blue fairy's idea of assurance that they wouldn't back out of their deal and decide to run away instead.

Regina just thought it made the whole situation more stressful. She wasn't going to run away, there was no where to run too, and no means of survival once she got there. Cora could find her anywhere, that she was certain of, the only way to keep herself and the child safe was to hide her. If Cora found out about her baby, Regina wasn't sure who she would murder first, her or the child. Currently her mother was away for the year, her and her father were vacationing in Wonderland, but when she got back, the child needed to be gone, and so did the extra pounds she put on from the pregnancy, though she knew she could lose those quickly, she had been careful not to gain too many.

The snow could make it hard to travel though, and it might take them more than four hours to get to the castle. Plus there was the fact that she would have to ride back, and she was in no condition to ride.

Regina tried not to think about all this though. As Daniel got the horses to go, she gazed into her baby's face and stroked her small forehead. That too, fit into her hand.

They got to the castle just in time, but the guards were reluctant to let them inside. Daniel helped her out of the carriage, and it disappeared behind them. Finally, someone came with a note to the guards, (signed by the king) ordering them that they were to be allowed inside. The man also offered to take their two horses to the stables, which Daniel agreed to gratefully.

Regina couldn't help herself from looking up and around at the riches surrounding the interior of the castle. They filled her with envy for more reason than one, for their beauty also stole away some of her last glances toward her child. She would be safe here though, well cared for and treated for, like Daniel was constantly reminding her.

The king and queen met them in a long rectangular room. Daniel bowed, Regina gave a small bow as well. The king and queen were unable to have children of their own. They had put out a notice, seven months ago, that they were looking for someone to be a surrogate mother to their child. Regina, who had recently found out she was pregnant with her and Daniel's child, had come to the castle and offered her services. They had liked her, and agreed that she was both pretty and smart, and that a child from her would be fit to become their own.

"I have one request," Regina found herself saying now, before she handed them the child.

Daniel looked at her in shock mixed with outrage. To ask anything of them at all when they were in this position, was dangerous, it could compromise their deal.

"She shall be named Snow, Snow White. For the snow was falling around the cave where she was born."

The queen looked to her husband in protest, but he only nodded , taking the child from Regina's arms. "As you say," he said, with a trace of a grin, impressed, or perhaps amused, at her strength.

**Twelve years later**

Regina pulled away from Daniel's hands, not wanting to kiss him again. "I can't believe you forgot."

"Its been a long time Regina, it's not like I would ever forget about her, its just the specific day, and all..."

Regina gave him a look which shut him up, her brown eyes burning.

She began to untie her horse from the tree.

"Come on don't do that," Daniel said. He hated having their make out sessions on the hill be cut short. "It was just a small, mental slip! I just momentarily forgot!"

"Right," Regina mounted her horse, kicking him a bit harder than necessary. She was grateful for her extra speed though, when she saw something flying down the other side of the hill, screaming for help. The cries were wailing, like that of a desperate baby, and they cut Regina to her core.

She only had to squeeze her legs to bring her horse's canter into a full blown gallop.

A small child was hanging onto a horse who was out of control running down the hill. She was about to lose her grip, when Regina caught up to her and lifted her onto her own horse. She stopped her horse and the child fell down, tumbling into the long grass. Regina dismounted and helped the child up quickly, only then meeting her eyes.

Regina was struck by a sudden sense of familiarity.

"It's okay dear, you're safe," Regina said, the girl's wide eyes still looked terrified.

"You saved my life," the girl said panting.

"Are you alright?" Regina asked, still taken it back by the way the girl's gaze made her feel...like she knew her from somewhere.

"Yes...but I'll never ride again."

"Nonsense, the only way to overcome fear is to face it. To get back on that horse as soon as possible."

"Thank you...?"

"Regina."

"I'm Snow, Snow White," the child said. Then she flung her arms around Regina.

Regina felt immediate warmth as the child wrapped her arms around her, but she also felt shock. She found herself looking over her shoulder anxiously, like her mother might be watching. She realized she was being silly though, her mother wouldn't know who Snow was even if she was watching.

"You mean, you're the princess?" Regina asked after Snow pulled away.

"Yes," Snow said happily.

"Oh...well, that's, that's nice," she couldn't believe it, she was meeting her daughter, she had just saved her life.


	2. Chapter 2: Light Your Fires In The Cave

**Chapter Two**

Every year on Snow's birthday, Regina and Daniel would ride out to the cave, and light a small fire inside. There, they would warm their hands against the flames that took energy from the ground that Snow was born onto.

Daniel had forgotten today. He had met her at the top of the hill like always, except without the sorrow in his eyes. (Regina always brought the matches anyways). But if he hadn't forgotten, they would have already been in the cave, sharing looks of compassion over their loss, while Snow would be flying down that hill with no one to save her.

Regina stroked the horse's face, looking deep into her eyes as a way of avoiding looking into Snow's. "What's her name?"

"I haven't decided yet," Snow said. "I'm bad with names, and I just got her, for my birthday."

Regina grimaced at the mention of Snow's birthday. Her own father had allowed her to start leasing a horse from Daniel's stables on her fifteenth birthday. Snow was a little young to be learning to ride, but not, Regina supposed, for a princess.

Regina held out the reins to Snow. "Can you find your way back alright? The people looking after you must be worried."

Snow's face fell considerably, but she took the reins. "Yeah...yeah I'm sure I can find my way back."

"Good." Regina stroked her own horse's shoulder and then mounted smoothly.

Snow remained on the ground, holding her horse's reins uncertainly.

Regina turned her horse's head away from Snow, about to leave her.

"Wait," Snow said. "Don't you, er...well. _Do _you want to meet my father? He would be really happy that you saved my life."

Regina blinked down at Snow, needing the extra second to reform the fairly obvious excuse she had already prepared in her mind a few moments ago. "I would love to, Snow, but I really need to go, my mother is expecting me, and is quite an impatient women. I feel that it would be rude to rush any interaction with your father."

Regina didn't think the King would react well to her sudden appearance, even under the circumstances. She didn't want to have to deal with the potentially awkward social encounter.

"Oh..." Snow looked disappointed again. Then she attempted to smile. "Okay."

Snow turned to leave, her steps hurried.

Regina felt this strange tearing sensation in her stomach, a tad bit worse than guilt. "If you ever need help with riding, I can teach you sometime." She called out before she could stop herself.

Snow looked back, a real smile spreading over her face. "That would be grand!" She said, then took off at a run up the hill, the horse, encouraged by her confidence, following her with less hesitation. Regina shook her head and smiled, watching her go.

But when she looked away from Snow, all feelings of brightness left her. A new fear gripped her shoulders, stiffened her neck. Snow wasn't supposed to be here. Here, where Cora was just a field-length away, here where Cora could be hiding in the grass, here where Cora could be hearing, where she could be seeing with her incredibly perceptive eyes, fitting the puzzle pieces of human minds and relationships together, Oh, if she ever found out!

Regina had suffered twelve years to make sure that she would not. As soon as Cora's claws were around a child's neck they would never slacken or fade away. As distant as Cora was from Regina, Regina could still never escape her, and Regina would do everything in her power to make sure the same thing didn't happen to Snow.

She hoped that Snow would soon forget about the nice women who helped her with her horse. How could she not? She was surrounded by people who loved her, a kingdom to cater to her every need. Regina was able to sufficiently assure herself that the encounter wouldn't mess everything up. But this assurance did nothing to smother the aching and screaming that was now bursting silently from her heart. She was being severed from her child _again._

_~S~S~S~_

Daniel was waiting for her at the top of the hill. His horse swished her tail impatiently, but he wore a smile. "So, you're back after all."

"Daniel, I just met our _daughter. _She was the one on the horse I just saved." She allowed a bitter note to enter her voice on the last sentence. _With no help from you, _It said.

Daniel frowned. "Snow?" His voice was small.

Regina nodded.

"That's not good though, the King, I don't think he wanted us to have any contact."

"I know." Regina said. "I don't think I should go riding for a while, in case she's out here. She might be out here, I offered to help her with her riding."

"You what?!" Fear and anger shown in his voice.

"I didn't mean to Daniel, the words just slipped out." Regina felt tears rising, and swallowed them down. She had hoped that Daniel might hold her, so that she would have someone to comfort her when she cried. But Regina never had that, why should now be any different. Annoyed, she turned her horse around and rode back to her mother's mansion at a quick pace.

She barely took the time to give her horse a pat goodbye after securing her in the stables. Regina took the back door into her mother's house. Looked around, and then, relieved that no one was there, closed herself into the nearest bathroom. There she could cry.

Regina was annoyed at Daniel over the next few days, though he tried to make it up to her.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm a big stupid insensitive idiot, can you please forgive me?"

"I'm not upset with you, Daniel," Regina insisted. "I'm not in a good mood because I can't stop thinking about it."

Regina refrained from using the word 'her' in case her mother was listening.

Daniel touched her cheek softly, and Regina thought he was going to try to kiss her, but instead he pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry," he said.

Regina ran her hand over the buttons on his jacket. "I'm sorry too."

Regina sat up. "But you know what? Maybe there _is _something we can do to help fix it." And she kissed him.

Regina was allowed a day of relative peace, and the day after that, she was examining herself in the mirror, preparing to ride away her memories and pain. Then her mother transformed her riding outfit into a dress, and although that change was fortunately not permanent, a much graver one would soon occur.


	3. Chapter 3: Watch Your Secrets Hit Ground

**Chapter Three**

Snow woke with the irresistible urge to cry. She rolled over, not wanting to get up today. She didn't know where the pain was coming from, except that it burned deep in her stomach. It felt sick, some deep psychological disease, but she couldn't put words to it's cause.

Her father would say that it was her mother, the queen who had died barely over a year ago. Snow knew it wasn't that. She would feel better about herself if it were that, and sometimes she convinced herself that it was. But she knew that it wasn't, no this pain had been growing inside of her since she was a very small child, it seemed to grow and age with her, and at random times, at least once a year, Snow would find herself crying in the night, waking herself up to her own tears and the confusion that came with them. She never knew why it was that she was crying, and always hoped that her maid wasn't around when she was to hear her and come inside and ask why. Because she never had an answer, and she hated it when people attempted to comfort her when she was feeling like this.

She felt a soft hand on her back. "Snow, it's time to get up."

Snow recoiled from the touch, shrinking farther under her blankets. She didn't know why, but she hated the touch, her maid's hand, she reasoned that perhaps she just didn't want to be touched at all by anyone, right now.

Then suddenly, an image of Regina ripped through her mind, her face when she smiled. Snow yelped, it felt painful, terrible, the image like fire to her eyes and closed eyelids, fire to her stomach, throughout her whole body, whatever this pained emotion was...

"Snow, are you alright? Snow?"

Snow shook herself and forced herself to roll off of her bed and stand.

"Are you okay?" Her maid asked again.

"Yes," Snow deadpanned, eyes to the floor. "I'm fine."

The maid touched her shoulder in remaining concern. "Your lesson will begin in fifteen minutes. Get dressed. Are you sure you are alright dear?"

"Yes," Snow said firmly, she really wanted to be left alone.

Snow wandered down the corridor, until she found her favorite bathroom, or at least her favorite one on this floor. She turned on the water and listened to its sound as it hit the stone basin. She peered into her face, then took her fingers, put them under the water, brought them to her face and drew a line from the corner of each eye down her cheek, washing away the salty tears slowly. Her cheeks were squishy beneath her touch, she peered into her face, but she didn't understand it, she didn't know what she looked like, who she looked like, or what she was. She blamed her strange mood on drowsiness, but she knew that wasn't it.

She couldn't explain why, but the memories of that women, that Regina, were causing her terrible pain, the same pain that had been a mystery to her for so long, is what it felt like, but it couldn't be the same pain, could it? Who was this Regina woman anyway? Snow barely knew her, but already, she felt like the most important woman in the world.

Snow was able to focus on the lesson, to listen to the numbers, and patterns and sequences of math, even take it in, nod, and repeat it back, but all the while as she stood before her teacher while he spoke, the nausea in her stomach stirred.

After an hour, her teacher dismissed her for her break. "Go outside, get some air," he said. "You don't look well, Snow."

Snow went to the stables, nervously. She wasn't allowed to ride without her instructor, but she could visit her horse. Stroking her horse's face and looking into her deep eyes, reminded her of Regina, the woman she didn't know, the woman who loved horses.

Snow went outside into the grass, where the dandelions spotted the field. She picked one up and twirled it between her fingers, then preceded to rip some of the petals off.

_"Don't do that Snow," _She remembered her mother telling her. _"Make a tiara with them, here, like this, like a Princess."_

But Snow didn't want to make a Tiara, she felt guilty, as she continued to rip the petals off of the plant. She wondered what Regina would do, with a dandelion. Snow threw the flower away from her. It was a stupid thought.

A shadow fell over the grass, and Snow felt her father's hand on her shoulder. He knew her patterns well, to find her in this part of the field, at this precise time. "Snow, you're getting pollen all over your dress," he said softly.

Snow looked down, and brushed at the yellow spots on her dress, accidentally rubbing some of the pollen in.

"Your, caretakers have told me that you have not been yourself lately. Tell me Snow, how are you feeling?"

"I miss my mom," Snow said softly, and she felt tears rising behind the words, but it wasn't true exactly, not really. "I miss-" she shouldn't say it, it would sound stupid. "I miss the woman who saved my life. She reminded me of her." It wasn't true exactly, Regina seemed very motherly to Snow, she reminded Snow very much of a mother, but for some reason she didn't remind her of her mother, that is, of the woman who raised her.

"Regina?" He said the word, and there was a hint of hardness in his voice.

Snow looked up at the name, looked at his expression, but she couldn't read it. Was it concentration? Like when she struggled with a math problem in school. Anger even?

"Snow, I hate to see you upset like this," The King was narrowing his eyes. "Do you like her, this Regina?"

"Yes," Snow nodded quickly, hopefully. "Very much. I, I wish I could see her again. I miss her, and I don't know why..." Snow stopped herself before she said anything more, she hadn't meant to let all of those words tumble out.

The King stared at her for a long moment.

"Very well," he said. "You shall see her again soon." And he turned elegantly, his cloak swishing against the grass, leaving Snow to wonder what he meant.

~S~R~S~R~

Regina ran, full out ran, to the barn, the memories stuck in her head uncomfortably. The image of the king one knee bent before her, his hard brown eyes, threatening, the ring held out in his hands like gleaming poison. _Would he tell her, would he tell her, would he tell her? _The words pounded in her mind to her footfalls, and to her heartbeat.

"Daniel something terrible has happened!" she called. She skidded to a stop in front of him.

"What has happened?" He said, raising his hands to cup her face.

"Its the king," Regina said panting a little. "He's asked me to marry him. I think, I mean, he told me, that if I didn't he would tell Cora about Snow." After proposing, the King had took her aside for a private word, his sharp eyes picking up on the fact that Regina was not too eager to marry him.

Anger crossed Daniel's face as he stroked Regina's cheek. "Doesn't he know the danger he would put her in by doing so? How can he actually use his own daughter as a bargaining tool."

Regina shook her head. "I don't think he fully understands. He doesn't think that Cora is a threat to her, he thinks she is only a threat to me. I tried to explain, what Cora would do to the child."

"Do you think she would kill Snow?"

"I'm not sure. I once did, but now I am not sure. I just know that whatever my mother would do to the child, it would be awful. We can't let it happen Daniel, we can't let her know, or all of this," Regina lifted her hands, then let them go, "torture, would be for nothing."

Daniel's eyes became distant, and his expression slackened. "Then you have to marry the king."

"I know, but I don't want to!" Regina pounded on Daniel's chest with a fist in frustration, then began to sob. It wasn't just the thought of marrying the king that felt so terrible, though by the hard glint in his eyes, she knew that it would be terrible, what was worse was that he had used telling Cora as a threat to force her to marry him, and if he was using this as a threat now, he was bound to use it again, to keep Regina continually in his control.

Daniel caught her with his arms, and wrapped them around her soothingly. Regina rarely let him see her cry. He held her tightly, running a hand up and down her back gently.

Regina was filled with the warmth from his embrace, and her flow of tears stopped in only a few minutes. She wiped off her face with her hand, then pulled Daniel's head to her own for a kiss.

Regina pulled away to speak, "she'll never find out about our daughter," Regina said with love in her eyes, warmed by the embrace and willing the words to be true.

Daniel grinned, "Snow will be safe."

"Regina?" A high, sweet sounding voice called tentatively.

Regina whirled around. A look of shock and horror came over her face, at the girl standing innocently in the doorway to the barn.

"Oh-" She said, observing Regina's expression, her eyes flicking to Daniel. "I was just here to ride I, better go." She turned on her heel and ran.

"Snow, wait!" Regina called, but the girl didn't stop. Exchanging a quick glance with Daniel, "stay," she told him, before running after Snow. He wouldn't want to come anyway, she just told him that so he would feel better. Daniel wasn't the best with children, they loved him, and he loved them, but he wasn't the best with manipulating them, Regina was better at that, having grown up with Cora as a mother.

Regina chased after Snow, who was doing pretty well running away, until she tripped on a tree root and fell. Regina felt a pang as Snow fell and cried out. She quickly skidded to a halt on the ground in front of her, dropping down to Snow's level. "Are you okay?" Regina put a hand on the girl's shoulder.

Snow sniffed and raised her head to meet Regina's eyes. Tears streamed from the girl's eyes and ran over her reddened cheeks. "Is it true? What I heard? Are you my mother?"

The idea of lying crossed Regina's mind but she discarded it quickly. Snow's eyes were glowing with innocence, but not stupidity. "Yes," Regina breathed.

Snow looked down immediately.

Regina reached out a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind Snow's ear, but then stopped, her hand hovering in mid-air, unsure.

"Then why do I live with the king?" Snow said in a small voice, still staring at the ground.

Regina realized she shouldn't second guess herself, at Snow's vulnerable and hurt tone, and she reached out and tucked a strand of loose hair behind Snow's ear soothingly.

"To protect you," Regina said gently.

"From what?" Snow still wasn't looking at her, a stray tear slid down her cheek.

"Look at me," Regina commanded in the most motherly voice Snow had ever heard.

Snow felt like she was lifting a heavy boulder off of her eyelids, as she raised them. Regina's brown eyes were the most intense eyes she had ever seen. They seemed to bore into her, but in an almost gentle yet demanding way, as if their eyes were reconnecting, a cord was growing between them, like an umbilical cord. Snow realized she was holding her breath in fear and wonder.

Regina wiped her tear away, then caught Snow's chin in her hand. "From my mother. She is the most dangerous woman in existence, to you, and possibly to anyone. She cannot know, that you are my daughter, or I cannot imagine what would happen."

She let go of Snow's chin, and brushed some more of her hair away from her face, even though it wasn't really messy. It was soft and delicate, probably the softest hair Regina had ever felt, she was afraid to break it, even with her gentlest touch.

"And that man, in the barn, that's my father?"

"Daniel, yes."

"So we're a family?" Snow's face broke into a small grin.

"Yes," Regina said, too distracted to wonder why that word seemed to make Snow so happy, but she took advantage of that happiness anyway,"but we're a secret family, you have to keep us a secret. Your king wants to marry me, he cannot know about Daniel."

"I promise," Snow said. "As long as we can be together."

Regina felt her heart aching. "Yes Snow, we can be together now." And she pulled her into a hug, feeling slight desperation, then relief, at finally being able to wrap her arms around Snow, at finally being able to hold her daughter with her knowing the truth, and in that moment the fear that was gripping her seemed to evaporate, so she was able to let the words out with incredible warmth. "I love you Snow," she said into her hair. "I always have."

"Really?" Snow pulled away to look at her.

Regina laughed softly, but affectionately, at her expression of surprise "yes."

"That's good," Snow said. "because I loved you ever since I met you, and I didn't even understand it until now."

Regina looked at her curiously. "You have good instincts Snow. Did you...guess?"

Snow beamed with pride under her praise. "No," she said truthfully. "I didn't know that I was adopted. But I knew something was wrong, and I knew there was something special about you."

Regina helped Snow to her feet, then offered her a hand. Snow took it. "Do you want to meet your father now?" Regina asked.

Snow nodded vigorously, and Regina laughed happily at her enthusiasm.

Daniel shifted awkwardly from foot to foot as Snow and Regina approached.

"Daniel, meet your daughter, Snow," Regina said. She was inwardly amused at their similar expressions. She didn't know who looked shier, Daniel or Snow.

"Hi," he said, nervously, trying to mask it, as he extended his hand.

Snow placed her small one into his, and then shook it, looking up at him with the smallest grin Regina had ever seen. "Hi," she said back. Regina decided that Snow had won the contest, she looked shier.

Regina snuck up behind Snow playfully and scooped Snow into her arms. Snow shrieked then laughed with shock. Regina guided them into a group hug, but as Daniel put his arms around both of them, he met Regina's eyes, with a sharp question in them, Regina knew what it was: _Should Snow really know? _

Regina gave a small shake of her head, she would explain it to him later. For now, they should bask in the victory of the moment.

**Author's Note: Sorry it's been so long since I've updated, I've had a lot going on in my life, but I do plan on continuing this story. Reviews are highly appreciated!:) **


	4. Chapter 4:His Dark Heart

**Chapter Four**

One wrong move and Cora would know what Regina had made a huge sacrifice to protect.

Regina pulled away from the hug, realizing what she had to do.

"Snow, you must tell no one what happened." Regina bent down so that she was at Snow's level, she took Snow's shoulders in her hands and looked firmly into her eyes. "In public, you must not call Daniel your father, you must call him Daniel, do you understand?"

Snow nodded, made shy by the stern edge in Regina's voice.

"Call me Regina in public too," Regina said as an afterthought. "It will seem suspicious if you suddenly start calling me mom right after me and your father get married. And above all else, stay away from Cora. Talk to her as little as possible."

Regina was sure that if Cora had too many interactions with Snow, she would eventually notice the similarities between the two of them. Their face shape and the curves of their eyebrows were identical.

"But when you do talk to Cora, make sure you act natural, do not act afraid, but do no act too confident either. You do not want to seem like you are hiding something or Cora will sense this instantly and will seek to find it out." Regina paused. _This is too much for a child to remember,_ she thought. She knew that she would have been able to remember all of this at Snow's age, but she had been conditioned her whole life to take caution around Cora and manipulate her actions so as to avoid as much conflict with Cora as was possible to avoid.

Regina sensed that from Snow's hyper-sensitive demeanor, that rewards would be necessary to motivate her as well as fear. "Just remember, that whatever happens...I love you."

Snow nodded but was too nervous to speak.

"And I love you as well," Daniel said to Snow.

Regina stood and took his arms. "Daniel..." she said softly, bracing herself for what she had to do. Daniel and her had had their series of conflicts over the years, but in the end she loved him, and he had become a valuable friend and companion.

"We can't see each other anymore..."

"We'll work something out."

"No, this has to be the end, its too dangerous."

"But Snow, she loves riding, I could volunteer as her riding instructor or something, offer my horses for the King's service."

"And draw Cora's attention to you? To the fact that you and Snow look so alike? Daniel...don't be reckless," Someone not as articulate as Regina probably would have just used the word 'stupid' but living with Cora had taught her to be very careful with her word choice, and this increased Regina's abilities to flatter, and gently manipulate...

"But Regina, you still must visit me, Cora knows that we are friends..."

"And also knows that we are more! As soon as you are portrayed as a threat your life will be in danger. The best thing for me to do in this situation is pretend that I want the power that being with the King will give me, and that I no longer care for someone with your social status."

"You must visit me."

Regina kissed him. Then breathed into his ear so Snow wouldn't hear. "I will, wait for me at precisely the half moon every month, in the stables and I will come to visit then, apart from that we must have no further contact, do you understand?" Regina kissed below his ear so it wouldn't look so suspicious to Snow.

"Yes," Daniel gasped.

Regina smirked and pulled away.

Regina held out her hand for Snow who meekly took it. "Come on, Snow, let's go."

Regina's grip was firm as she led Snow back to the castle, but slowly softened. Snow's hand felt soft and small in her own, as if Snow was merely a baby.

"Regina?" Snow said.

"Yes?" Regina mentally commended Snow for using her proper name.

"I love you too."

Regina smiled down at Snow, eyes full of sympathy. "I know sweetie."

~R~S~R~

As the days passed, Regina's anxiety over Cora only increased.

Cora was constantly watching. As Regina helped Snow plant flowers in the new garden made in her honor, Regina felt Cora's eyes. As Regina helped Snow pick out an outfit for their first day together after the wedding, she felt Cora watching. Even when the door to Snow's room was closed, and Snow was sitting on Regina's lap while Regina brushed her hair, she felt Cora's presence lingering around the room.

"You are doing so well with the child," Cora told her, when she caught Regina alone in Regina's large room, (luckily she had one separate from the king) fixing her necklace after a particularly long lunch with the king and his wealthy friends, a lunch Snow had not been invited too. At least when Snow was with her, Regina felt like her time with the king was less pointless.

"It almost seems as if, this comes naturally to you Regina." Cora continued. "A born mother."

Cora left before Regina could say anything, which she was glad. Regina's mouth hung slightly open as she watched Cora's back leave her room, but she wouldn't have known how to reply. What, would she have complimented Cora's skills as a parent?

Regina scoffed audibly, and started taking out her long, heavy earrings to replace them with simple diamonds.

It seemed, in the long run, the only thing that would really protect Snow in the end would be magic. Regina always came to this conclusion after pondering out possibilities, and it always filled her with so much hard dread, that she had to force herself to think about the subject, and thinking about it was painful.

Her mother had always used magic to torment her. Whether it was the magic of words, or the magic of a dark room that Cora could charm to make it seem like she had been inside it for months without food and water when in reality it was only a day, or the magic of bedsheets that stung her all over her body when she slept but when she asked her mother in the morning she had said she didn't know perhaps she was allergic to the fabric, or the magic of a strap that hit so hard it felt like it was cutting into Regina's skin, but left no mark.

There were many more ways, in which Cora had psychologically abused her as well. One was that Cora would never tell Regina that she loved her too, if Regina ever said 'I love you' first. It may seem unrealistic that Regina would be so bold as to dare utter that to her mother, but Cora used to tell her constantly that she loved her, her words just didn't seem to mean anything.

Regina had been ignorant to what love actually was until she was fifteen, when her English teacher, Tinker Bell, had gone out of her way to develop a bond with her.

Regina realized, as she looked at herself in the mirror and thought about using magic to save Snow, that she had done one thing like her mother, on that fateful night that Snow had found out the truth. She had not told Snow that she loved her too, when Snow had said 'I love you'. Now granted, Snow had said 'I love you too' which was in response to Regina's original 'I love you' but Regina still could have said it again. Regina felt like she should have said it again.

Magic though, magic was different, magic was necessary. Regina promised herself she would tell Snow she loved her only when she meant it, but she also promised herself that she would say it every time Snow said it first, and mean it every time she said 'I love you too.'

As much as Regina hated it, she needed magic. She needed magic to save Snow's life. And that's what would make her different from her mother, ultimately. Cora had never used magic for anything other than to serve herself.

The king had granted Cora a room in the castle. She had told him that she thought her daughter would be more comfortable, and settle in more easily if she had her mother there. Regina knew that Cora's residence in the castle would be permanent.

But there was one advantage. Regina was on very good terms with the maids. She small talked with them like equals, gave them advice on what clothes to wear to their school balls, or to their weddings. Cora didn't see the importance of winning the approval of those so low down on the social latter, but Regina, loved the look of adoration and love in the eyes of the servants, and knew the importance of genuine flattery. So when Regina knew that Cora was occupied with the clothing designer, ordering her around briskly to make her a dress that perfectly matched her requirements, Regina asked one of the maids to open Cora's room for her.

Cora's room in her home had always been guarded by magic, but the castle itself, had many enchantments in place upon it to protect the royal family. And one of those included the repellent of foreign spells.

The maid had the key to Cora's room, just like everybody else's.

Inside, Regina searched until she found her mother's spell book, then quickly left. She hid the book under the mattress, and that night, after slipping into bed, got it out.

She tried to open it, but she realized the pages had been glued shut by magic. She groaned and was about to throw the book to the floor. Her thumb raked over the binding, and she felt letters. She was intrigued yet also amused by the strange name written there.

"Rumple-stirts-skin?"

"That's not how you say it Dearie," A dark voice said.

Regina jumped.

She didn't want to, but she forced herself to turn around.

"It's Rumplestiltskin," He said with a bow. "I've been waiting for you to call me, Regina." He bared greening teeth in a large smile.

"How do you know my name?" Regina was too shocked to refrained from asking questions that she suspected that she knew the answer too.

"I was a, shall we say, friend," He gave a short high chuckle. "Of your mother's."

_Of course._ Regina thought.

"I have noticed though, Regina, that although you have had plenty of situations where you required my help, you have not called on me. You have instead, chosen to rely on the help of those, who use, perhaps lighter but much less effective forms of magic, such as your dealings with the Blue Fairy," he sounded amused when he said her name.

Regina began to like this Rumplestilskin in spite of herself. He was a friend of her mother's which immediately made her take caution, and she was afraid of him, instinctively, he radiated vibes of power, which seemed even stronger (she hadn't thought that was possible) than her mothers, but hey, at least he had good taste in people.

"What can you do to help me?"

Rumplestiltskin laughed. "Plenty, plenty Dearie. More than your little mind can imagine. I believe, correct me if I'm wrong, you have a little situation with Snow White?"

"I need to find a way to save her," Regina said in a low voice. "If there's anything you can do, maybe, disguise her, as another person, and then fake her death, so that she can get away and my mother-"

"Nope, can't do!" Rumplestiltskin interrupted her suddenly. "You see Dearie, if you want me to do something for you, you have to do something for me. And your mother is precisely the reason why you can do something for me."

"What do you mean?"

"Your mother is the most powerful which in the land, besides me of course. Her magic is strong, and she has been able to control far more than anyone who is not the Dark One should be able to control. Many years ago, before you were born, your mother took my heart. Yes dearie, literally. And although she has not been able to control me with it, because I am the Dark One, and cannot be controlled in such means, she has been able to use it to leech the power off of it, and fuel her own, making her so powerful, that she has limited my access to many realms."

"Why do you need to go to other realms?"

"That is my business," Rumplestiltskin snapped.

"But I don't understand, how can I help you? Do you want me to steal the heart back for you, I'm sure she has it heavily protected."

"No, that's not good enough. As long as Cora is alive, my heart will always be in danger. She has placed an enchantment over my heart, but that enchantment will fade at her death."

"You want me to kill my mother?!"

"No, I want you and Snow too. The two of you must come with me, train, and I will hide you and protect you from Cora, in exchange, for when the time comes, you and her will kill her."

"Can I have some time to think about it? A week maybe."

"Very well," Rumplestilskin said. "I shall return in a week Dearie, think carefully." And he disappeared.

Regina sat down on her bed with a heavy sigh. It was time to say goodbye to Daniel for real.

**Author's Note: Okay, I know that it has been forever since I have updated, but I have been so busy lately. I finally found the energy and inspiration to continue!:) Review!:)**


	5. Chapter 5: Is Gone

**Chapter Five**

Snow's father seemed content in her raised spirits. Snow now had a certain energy to her speech and movements, that he had never seen her possess before. Snow followed Regina everywhere that she could. She could always be found walking through the hallways beside Regina, gazing up at her and asking questions, skipping along side-ways, happily badgering her.

If there was a tired, somewhat exasperated look on Regina's face, Snow seemed not to notice.

One day Regina was out horse-riding, and Snow sat alone on the floor of her room, reading a book. The king was a shadow in the doorway, who stepped into the room.

"You like Regina don't you?" It was more of a statement than a question.

"Oh yes!"

"Why don't you call her mother?"

Snow's expression changed. Her face lost all of its light and turned to fear. "Oh, I don't need to do that," Snow looked quickly back at her book again.

The king watched her suspiciously for a few more minutes then he left the room. He figured Snow's real mother had a permanent place in her heart that no one could encroach on, the mother who raised her, that is. His wife.

The King had agreed to Cora's request to move into the castle, knowing it would keep the threat of her presence alive to Regina. He didn't find their to be anything particularly malicious about the older women, and figured that in reality the revealing of Regina's secret to her mother would only cause strain in their relationship, and nothing more. The women was confident, but by no means dangerous, the king knew, but she inspired fear in Regina's heart, which could only lead to her obedience, which was of course, an absolute necessity to the king.

The King arranged to have a dinner with just him and Snow every other week. He didn't want Snow to feel as if he was disappearing from her life, or that Regina was taking his place. Snow endured these dinners without much enthusiasm. Her father inspired fear in her, and did not seem to have much to talk about. His only questions pried into her own life.

Snow, for the most part, felt positively about the new living arrangements. She found that her outlook on life had improved, she was no longer dreading the next day, but instead planning for it. Regina's presence just made everything in her life so much more interesting. There was so much that she wanted to show and tell Regina about herself, and she had so many questions for her as well...

She had slowly allowed herself to open up to Regina. To tell her things that she would never have dreamed of telling another person. For example, she gave her her honest opinion on horseback riding, which she had never told a soul. Horse riding made her anxious, and filled her with dread, and if it was her choice she would never do it again. She had only really been trying so hard to get good at it because it would please her father, who believed that it was necessary for princesses to be proficient in riding.

So caught up in herself, she didn't notice the look of disappointment verging on disgust on Regina's face when she told her this. Both of Snow's parents loved horses and loved riding.

But instead of voicing her thoughts, Regina just told Snow that she should do whatever she liked to do, and if that was reading, she should do that instead of riding. Snow didn't like being _left_ alone by Regina when Regina went riding, but she did like the time to herself to read.

Snow's room was still halfway across the castle from Regina's but her father was in the process of having a new room decorated for her that would be right next to Regina's. Snow had fallen into a secret habit. If she woke in the middle of the night with a nightmare, she would sneak across the castle. She would go to Regina's room, and clasp the door handle. She would close her eyes and think about how much she loved Regina, and had missed her her whole life. The door handle would turn warm underneath her hand, and then she would turn the handle and the door would open. Snow didn't know for sure that this was magic. She liked to think that it wasn't, because Regina had mentioned magic a few times, and had always spoke of it darkly. She figured that maybe Regina just didn't lock her door?

The first time she had tried the door though, the first time she had had a nightmare while Regina was living in the castle, it hadn't opened until she closed her eyes and thought of Regina. Then the door handle had turned easily, and she had been able to peer in and watch Regina's sleeping form. She was curled on her side, and looked much less intimidating in sleep, though she still was, a bit intimidating to Snow. What if she woke up? Snow didn't want Regina to think that she was weak, or that she needed help after having bad dreams. Snow desperately wanted Regina to hold her, or comfort her when she was crying, but Snow was too afraid to let this happen. Snow's greatest fear, was that Regina would reject her, and abandon her again.

Snow had preformed her secret habit no less than once every three days since the second day that Regina had been living in the castle.

Now Regina and Snow had been spending time together for a little over four weeks, and it was the half moon. Snow had a nightmare.

When Snow entered the room, it was empty. She was filled with a sudden panic and disorientation. What time was it really? She looked out the window, and could see through the curtain that the sky was still dark.

Snow turned on the light, and looked around the room for Regina as if she could be hiding in the closet.

Snow figured Regina could have just left to use the bathroom, but she wanted to see her when she came back. Snow never woke Regina in her nighttime travels, she only watched her sleeping body from the door, somehow just comforted by her presence.

Snow hid under the bed. She only had to wait a little less than 30 minutes before she heard footfalls and saw the shadow of legs through the fabric covering the area underneath the bed. Snow raised her head to try and see threw a crack in the fabric. She accidentally hit her head on the bottom of the bed.

"Ow," she said.

The shadow of the legs stopped.

Snow felt her body suddenly pulled forward. Her head hit the fabric covering the bed, and then she was whizzed out onto the floor. She looked up, and saw that she was at the feet of Cora.

Cora smiled down at her.

Snow realized, that although she had remembered to turn off the lights, she had forgotten to close the door.

"I was just on a nighttime stroll when I noticed that my daughter's door was open," Cora said. "She doesn't appear to be here though. Do you happen to know where she is?"

"N-no," Snow said, remembering she was supposed to act natural and mentally admonishing herself for stuttering.

"That's not good," Cora's voice was laced with concern. "I hope that something didn't happen to her."

Snow had never been alone with Cora before, Regina had always been with her, on the few occasions that she had had small exchanges of polite conversation with Cora. Regina was doing everything she could to ensure that Cora interacted with Snow as little as possible. Snow pictured Regina in her mind, when she was smiling at her with love. Thinking of this, she tried to calm herself down.

"She could be in the bathroom," Snow said, finding a good, normal tone of voice, and standing up. She brushed off her nightdress, trying to appear unconcerned. "I wouldn't worry at all about it, Cora."

"Cora? What a formal way to address me," It wasn't of course, Snow should have remembered to call her 'Ms. Mills', but Regina never did though, so 'Cora' came naturally to her. "We are family now Snow. Call me grandmother."

Snow couldn't help but openly flinch at the name.

Cora noticed. "What is it?" Her eyes had suddenly become dark.

"Nothing."

"What are you doing here anyway? Hiding in your mother's room?"

"She's not my mother," Snow said abruptly.

Cora raised an eyebrow. "Why on earth would you say something like that?"

Cora stroked Snow's hair, and Snow felt a funny feeling coming over her brain. It felt like clouds had surrounded all of her thoughts, making them possible to access but just very hard too. Snow knew instinctively that it was magic.

"I mean, I mean I like her a lot, and all, but we're not biologically related, was what I meant." Snow was doing her best to fight off the strange feeling in her mind, which seemed to be telling her to tell Cora that Regina _was_ her mother, so she did the only thing she could and argued with the strange thing that was, not quite a voice, but more like a sensation.

Cora let go of her hair, and Snow felt the strange feeling lift from her brain.

Cora adjusted the ruby ring on her left hand finger.

Snow was nervous and wringing her hands. Her brain was too tired to be dealing with Cora, to be fighting off magic, although now, she felt herself becoming suddenly alert.

"Such a talented child you are," Cora said softly, rubbing the surface of her blood red ring. "Biologically...why..." Then suddenly her eyes widened. "Daniel."

Snow suddenly felt dread drop into her stomach, and then paralyze her.

"Come with me darling, it is time to go find your mother."

Snow was shaking her head. "No.." she wanted to bolt, but her legs were rooted to the spot.

Cora leaned down, and, with a sigh, ripped out Snow's heart. Snow gasped as Cora's hand was buried deep within her chest, there was a terrible pain, like a tooth being pulled from its gum, but a thousand times worse, as Cora gripped her heart and tugged it out.

"Come with me dear. Now." Cora gave Snow's heart a little squeeze.

Snow had no choice but to follow. She couldn't control any of her limbs, she couldn't even move her eyes.

~S~R~S~

Regina was in the barn with Daniel, when she turned to see Cora holding her daughter's heart.

Cora walked swiftly over to Daniel and yanked out his heart as well.

Cora held both of their hearts, Daniel's in one hand, Snow's in the other.

"Don't hurt them!" Regina cried frantically. She ran at Cora, but then stopped short.

Snow was watching Regina with a look of utter fear in her eyes. Daniel was clutching his chest where his heart used to be.

"Tell me the truth Regina," Cora said. "Is Snow your daughter?"

"What?!"

Cora squeezed Snow's heart and Snow screeched.

"Tell me, now."

Regina looked at Snow in desperation. She had no choice. "Yes," she breathed.

"And Daniel is the father?" She gripped Daniel's heart now, and Daniel started to double over, and moan in pain.

"Yes, but please, don't hurt them." Regina begged. Tears were now filling her eyes. "This was my fault, not theirs. Hurt me instead, not them. Punish me."

"Oh I intend to," Cora stepped forward. "How many times do I have to tell you that there are consequences for your actions?" For a moment she looked like a normal parent concerned for her child's safety, and while her face continued to display this, the human hearts she held tended to ruin this effect.

"Regina, this act, was not your fault. A pauper, never has the right to defile the body of the elite."

"Mother," Tears were streaming down Regina's face. "Daniel is not a pauper! Please, do not hurt him!"

"Yes, Regina, I think that is exactly what I will do." Cora squeezed Daniel's heart.

He collapsed on the ground. Regina looked past Cora and saw Snow's horrified expression, she was watching her own father die. Regina sparred a second for a thought of sympathy for Snow, then Regina knelt down beside Daniel. "I love you," she breathed.

Cora squeezed his heart to dust.

Daniel thrashed one last time and then lay still.

Cora knelt down beside Regina. "You see, my child? This is what happens when you go behind your mother's back, and break her rules, what was used to break them must be taken away."

Cora's grip on Snow's heart had loosened as she talked to Regina. Snow suddenly realized, that she could move her toes. The realization filled her with fear, and then adrenaline. Snow looked around with her eyes frantically, until she spotted a pitchfork leaning against a horse stall. It only took five steps for her to reach the pitchfork. It was heavy, but she still was able to lift it above her head as if it was weightless.

Snow ran at Cora, and as Cora's head whipped around, Snow swung the pitchfork and hit her in the head. Cora was knocked unconscious and fell to the ground.

Snow picked up her heart, and making eye contact with Regina, shoved it back into her chest.

Regina watched her with fear and wonder.

Her daughter was literally magical.

* * *

**Author's Note: Let me know what you think:)**


	6. Don't Let Your Feet Slip Over Forest

**Chapter Six**

Snow helped Regina carry Daniel's body out of the barn. She flexed that muscle in her brain that she was coming to know was _magic_ and the weight of Daniel's body lifted off of her hands and hovered above them.

Regina held onto Daniel's other side, and seemed not to notice.

When they reached the edge of the forest, they lowered him to the ground. Snow helped Regina cover his body with leaves and little pink flowers. Snow touched a few of them and they turned blue, but Regina also seemed not to notice. When they were done his body was completely concealed in pink and blue flowers, and dark green leaves.

"I wish that we could bury him properly, and give him a grave stone," Regina said, and her voice sounded rough and filled with tears that must have been clogging her throat. "But we don't have the time. My mother will be awake soon, and by then, we need to be far, far away from here."

"Where will we go?"

Regina gave Snow a sidelong look. "Away." She said firmly and without any further explanation. She couldn't say Rumplestiltskin's name without calling him, and the last thing she wanted was for him to appear now, while her mother was unconscious and demand that they kill her now. Regina figured that if they could find his house, he might take them in, and she might be able to bargain with him, to change his mind so that he would ask for something else besides her mother's death in exchange for their protection. She did not know Rumplestiltskin at all.

Regina sighed, "Come on dear." She led Snow back to the stables. "We're going to have to ride."

"No," Snow said and stopped dead. "Don't make me. Not now, I can't."

"Snow White," Regina said sternly. She was about to give her a harsh admonishment about obeying her mother, but then, thinking of her own mother, she just sighed, rolled her eyes, then spoke gently. "Come on honey, you have too...I'm sorry."

"But, but won't Cora be able to track the horses?"

"They are our fastest means of transportation." Regina said. "Cora hates riding, which means they are also an advantage that we have over her."

Snow bit her lip and looked down at the ground. She couldn't think of a way to win this argument.

Cora's body was still lying on the ground when they reached the stables. Snow stared at it and gave it a wide birth. Regina ignored it completely.

She saddled up her copper brown stead, then saddled a white horse for Snow. Finally, Regina cast a glance at her mother's fallen body. _Snow inherited something from you, mother,_ She thought.

Regina led the horses outside, then lifted Snow up. Snow kicked her legs in protest.

"Stop," Regina said firmly.

The word was like a slap, and instinctively Snow obeyed, feeling helpless as Regina set her on the horse and handed her the reins. "This is Daniel's horse, so all you need to do is hold on, it will follow me," Regina was about to smirk at the thought that even Daniel's horse would follow her around, but the pain that she felt was preventing her from doing so. Daniel had been her best friend.

Regina gave Snows hands a squeeze. "Everything is going to be okay."

Snow's eyes had wandered down to her hands, that Regina was clasping.

Regina tilted her head and collected Snow's gaze with her own. "Okay?"

Snow nodded.

"You just have to trust me, and yourself. Be strong, and brave, okay?"

Snow nodded. "Yes, mother."

Snow's eyes widened, she hadn't meant to say it, it had just slipped out. Regina was acting so motherly.

Regina hesitated, discomfort instinctively rolling through her body at the use of the word, that, previously, if Cora had heard her utter, would have ruined everything, but now, death had already come upon them, and Cora was lying just through the stable door.

Regina stroked Snow's cheek down to her chin. "It's okay dear," she said softly. "You can say it now."

Regina turned away to hide the tears that had come to her eyes, brought on by the sentence that cut her with two opposing realities. Now, they had their freedom, if they could escape that is, they would have more freedom than they had ever had, but the cost, was a huge sacrifice.

Regina swiftly mounted her horse. She rode listening to the sound of Snow's horse's hooves hit the ground behind her, and looking back every other second to make sure that child was still on her horse. The child's head, was almost always bowed. She wasn't making eye contact, and she most certainly wasn't watching where they were going.

The space between the trees lessened, as the trees thickened, the deeper they traveled into the forest. The branches and leaves from the trees, blocked out the light from the half moon, and soon, they were riding into pitch black darkness.

Suddenly, Regina saw a light, about the size of a firefly, cast out to illuminate an inch of the tree bark in front of her. She had looked back at Snow less and less the farther they traveled, and had instead relied on the sound of the horse, which was now panting heavily. Now, she looked back at her daughter, who had light in her hand. Regina stopped her horse, and Snow's stopped as well.

Snow looked up at her mother questioningly.

"We've traveled far enough for now, we should have a few hours to sleep, and the horses are tired as well."

Regina dismounted, then went over to Snow to help her down from her horse. She looked down at the light in Snows hands, and smiled gently. "Can you magic us some water as well?" Regina's voice faltered slightly in the middle of the sentence. The thought of Snow having magic, sent her thoughts racing. She couldn't just ignore it though, the child was obviously trying to get her attention with it, flaunting her new powers.

Snow smiled softly, at her mother's acknowledgement of her powers. She shook her head.

Regina lifted her down. Snow started to slip on the wet leaves of the forest floor, but Regina caught her.

Regina could faintly make out the sound of a stream flowing near-by, it was why she had decided to stop here.

She offered the horse's lead rope to Snow, but Snow shook her. Regina took both of the horses lead ropes, and made her way over to the stream. Snow clung pathetically at her side.

Regina patted each of the horses' warm necks, and let their lead ropes lengthen so they could drink. Then she knelt, and cupped her hands to drink. Snow just stood there.

After a long drink, Regina looked up. "Snow, aren't you thirsty?" She asked carefully.

Snow shook her head.

"You need to drink something, dear."

Snow's stomach was churning. She felt sick, and she could just imagine all of the bad bacteria crawling around inside of her. But she didn't want to burden her mother with her complaints, so she knelt to drink.

When Snow cupped her hands for water, Regina could see that they were shaking.

"Good girl," Regina murmured as Snow drank.

When Snow was finished, Regina found a fairly dry patch of forest, and tied the horses to a tree close to it. She didn't tie the knots too tightly, if the horses really needed too, they would be able to break the knots and flee. The horses were trained well enough though, not to break a knot unless they were in danger. Regina fondly stroked the horses, who had worked so hard to bring them this far, wishing she had a treat for them. Then she looked down at her daughter, who was staring up at her from the forest floor, and picking at the ground around her with her hands.

Regina knelt down beside her, they didn't have any blankets. Mutely, Snow scouted back an inch and pressed herself into Regina's side. Regina wrapped her arms around her. She maneuvered them so that they were both lying on the ground, arms still wrapped protectively over her daughter. She glared up into the trees, as if something would swoop down and snatch her from her.

~R~S~R~

As they continued to travel over the next few days, Snow barely spoke a word. Every now and then she would use magic, turn a red berry blue, or, play with a handful of light when it was dark, but this was the only form of expression she would use. Other than that, she either nodded, or shook her head, sometimes giving one-word answers when it was demanded of her.

Regina kept her calm by focusing on the more trivial tasks at hand. Finding grass for the horses, water for all of them, berries that weren't poisonous for Snow to nibble on, and assorted plants for her and Snow to eat. Tinker Bell, Regina's former English teacher, had known a lot about which plants in the forest were fairly nutritious and good for survival. Since Regina and Tinker Bell had had many long conversations after classes were over, Regina had learned about them and remembered what most of them looked like. Though they could survive off of the food, it left Regina's stomach feeling empty, her muscles constantly stiff and alert, and her mind increasingly irritated.

They had passed by three small villages already, but Regina hadn't entered any of them. She was afraid that word would have already reached those villages, of her and Snow's disappearance. She would need to wait until they were farther away from the castle, she told herself, to risk entering a village. By then news of their disappearance probably would have reached those far away villages, but at least they would have more time to escape if the king's soldiers were called upon to find them, because they would be farther away from the castle.

Regina sensed that someone like Rumplestiltskin wouldn't live in a village. He would live in a cottage somewhere, a magician's hut. She had hoped that it would have been relatively near to the castle, but they had past by no such place.

Regina had put them on a schedule so that they traveled by night, and day, and slept in short hour segments during both. Regina only slept in the night hours, in the day she couldn't help but keep watch other Snow. As obediently as Snow closed her eyes whenever Regina instructed her, she didn't think Snow was getting enough sleep. The bright light of day would keep her awake. The night's darkness would scare her, with no roof to protect her from it.

After less than four weeks the horses muscles were already thinning, despite the fact that Regina gave them ample time to graze. They weren't eating enough nutritious food was the problem, they needed grain, their feed, which was packed with essential nutrients and vitamins.

Snow and Regina's backs were now accustom to the hard forest floor. After four and a half weeks of traveling, Regina told them to stop riding, even though they had just completed one of their night hours and had not traveled far from their last resting place, they were only about two miles away from it. It was still dark. They were all dehydrated, and water was nowhere in sight.

Snow curled into Regina's body obediently, and Regina fell asleep only a few seconds after closing her eyes.

When she woke Snow was not beside her. Regina sat bolt upright, and looked around. "Snow?" she called groggily.

She spotted her, on the ground about five feet away, thrashing around.

"Snow?" Regina slid across the ground and looked down at her.

Tears were streaming over Snow's face, and her cheeks were all scrunched up in pain.

Regina took her shoulder in her hand and shook it gently.

Snow's eyes snapped open.

"Snow, what's wrong?"

"Daddy!" Snows voice sounded thick and baby-like. Snow swallowed, and then, for the first time in ages, spoke normally. "I killed him didn't I?"

Regina pulled Snow into her arms. Snow cried into her chest. Not silent tears anymore, loud, hard crying.

Regina rubbed her back. "No, Snow, it wasn't your fault."

Regina looked around, horrified. In the deepest part of herself, she had blamed Snow for Daniel's death. She had never gotten the story from Snow, and, in many ways she had been happy for Snow's silence because she hadn't been ready to talk about it. She hadn't been ready to relieve her daughter's pain, for what she had done. Even now, she didn't want to ask Snow, but she could see all to clearly, the psychological torment that Snow was going through, and as much as a deep part of herself didn't want to, she had to end it.

She held Snow gently and tightly, continuing to tell Snow that it wasn't her fault, to murmur to her softly.

Snow wrapped her arms around her mother tightly, and when her crying had quieted, she didn't look up or let go.

Regina stroked Snow's hair. She had to be careful how she phrased the question, if she wanted to get Snow to talk again. "Snow, what did Cora do to you?"

Snow didn't move right away. After a few minutes, she let go of Regina's waist, and sat in Regina's lap, pressing her back against Regina's chest. She looked down at her lap, and started playing with her own hands. She tugged at one of the loose threads on her dress which was becoming worn, but then decided to leave it, instinctively worrying for Regina's reprimand, which did not come.

Regina silently watched Snow, waiting.

Snow went back to playing with her hands, tugging her left pointer finger with her right thumb and pointer finger, clasping them together, twisting them around..."She caught me in your room." Snow said, jumping at the sound of her own voice.

Regina was startled too, she had been watching the movement of Snow's hands. Starting to think the girl would never talk.

Regina noticed all of the twigs and leaves that had gathered in Snow's hair. So focused on their survival, she hadn't worried about appearance. Her own hair was not the best looking, but was tied in a tight braid. Snow's hair had become matted. Regina started picking out the twigs, then divided Snow's hair into three sections.

"I..." Snow started again, a bit distracted by the movements of Regina's hands in her hair.

Regina started the hardest part of the braid, the first crossing of the sections of hair. She pulled it tight, and Snow made a face at the slight pain this brought to her scalp. "Yes, dear?" Regina said, twisting another section of hair into place.

Snow waited, and Regina began to think that she wouldn't tell her story. As bad for Snow as Regina felt, the irritation she had been feeling over the days began boiling into anger. She glared down at Snow's hair, and seeing a tangle in one of the sections, snagged her finger threw it. Snow let out a small noise of discomfort. Regina's expression became neutral again.

"I didn't mean for Cora to find me, but I accidentally left the door open of your room."

Regina was coming to the end of the braid. She didn't ask what Snow meant, even though she was being confusing. She figured she could piece the story together after Snow was done releasing her tidbits of information. Her one sentence segments.

Regina found a thick sprig of grass, plucked it, and used it to tie off the end of Snow's braid. Then she wrapped her arms around Snow's waist in a hug, and rested her chin on her head gently. She looked up at the light that was brightening through the cracks in the leaves, and tried to cool the anger and hatred she was feeling.

Snow shifted in her lap. "I'm sorry," Snow moaned. "I was so stupid, I didn't mean to say anything, it's just Cora, she's so smart!"

"Cora used to trick me all the time," Regina said. "_Anyone_ could be fooled by her."

"But I didn't say that I was your biological child, I said that you _weren't_ my biological mom, and then suddenly...it was like she knew."

"You brought it up?" Regina said angrily.

Snow shrank away from the tone. "I didn't mean too..." Snow said quietly.

A tear was making its way down Regina's cheek. She brushed it away.

"I didn't mean to kill him..." it was said so quietly Regina almost didn't hear it.

"Snow," Regina said firmly. "You didn't kill Daniel, Cora killed Daniel. It wasn't your fault."

Snow sighed and rested her head against Regina's shoulder. She loved having her mother here, so close and wrapped around her. But she could feel the waves of anger and hurt coming off of her mother's body, sense that her mother still did not forgive her. Snow didn't know Daniel, very well. She was devastated by his death, and what it meant, that the three of them being a family was a vision that could now never be, but he had more symbolic significance to her than emotional significance. What mattered to her most was Regina's opinion of her. What was tearing her up inside was that she knew that Regina blamed her for his death.

"I think it was," Snow said softly. Then she looked up into her mother's eyes bravely. "I love you, mom."

Regina looked at her uncertainty. What a peculiar time to say it. Although she realized, they hadn't exchanged this phrase over the entire course of their trip. "I love you too, dear."

Snow wanted to stay in her mother's arms much, much longer, but instead she stood up. "We should find the nearest village, shouldn't we?"

Regina blinked, caught off guard. "Why would you say that?"

"I don't think it's healthy for us to be out here for so long, I also think that it's easier for us to get caught like this. We can hide ourselves in a village, we can get jobs, I can work, and then we can make fake names for ourselves. And if anyone finds out who we are, we can ask them to please not tell. We can convince them not too."

After weeks of Snow behaving like a mute toddler, Regina was impressed by the return of her intelligence.

"There's something I haven't told you," Regina said.

Snow's brow furrowed. Her mother didn't trust her and was keeping secrets from her?

"There's a man who's house I've been hoping to stumble upon. Now, because it's unlikely that we will ever find his house by wandering through the forest, and because we are a safe distance away from my mother, I think we can say that it is safe to call on him."

Snow looked at her mother with wonder and confusion. "What do you mean?"

"You'll see," Regina said.

"Rumplestiltskin," Regina called. "Where the hell are you?"

A faint giggling sound could be heard from behind Regina. It grew louder. Rumplestiltskin stepped out from behind a tree.

"My, my, my, you'd think you'd mind the language around the young one dearie," Rumplestiltskin said.

Regina rolled her eyes. "It's not as if it's the most offensive word in existence," lack of proper food lowered Regina's filter. "And I think at this point we have bigger problems."

Rumplestilskin stepped around Regina, who had subconsciously positioned herself in front of Snow. He focused his yellow eyed gaze on the child.

Snow looked up at him boldly, without a speck of fear in her eyes.

Regina observed this with amazement, the child was always so anxious around her...

"Why my dear, you are quite magical are you not?"

Snow nodded and grinned. "I am magical, sir."

Rumplestilskin smiled, looking vaguely paternal. "Good, then you shall learn quickly."

All that reminded Regina of a paternal figure, was gone from his face by the last syllable.

* * *

**Author's Note: Review :)**


	7. Chapter 7: My Dear

**Chapter 7**

Rumplestiltskin's house was not anything like Regina had imagined it to be. It was not a Magician's Cottage, but a large mansion. There were plenty of rooms to spare, but Snow and Regina insisted on sharing one. Underneath the gleam of gold and red, magic pulled at the walls. Regina didn't want Snow to take a wrong turn while trying to find the bathroom at night, and be pulled into another universe.

She was paranoid to say the least, being constantly surrounded by magic. Her one great fear, all throughout her childhood was now the focus of her life.

The horses were given a stable at Rumplestiltskin's large house. They watched him with continued unease, whenever he would appear before Snow and Regina when they were together in the stables, telling them it was time for a lesson. Snow liked riding with Regina now, it reminded her of the trip when it was just the two of them, and even though it had been a painful journey, somehow it felt as if they had bonded even more over it, and being reminded of it gave Snow comfort.

Snow liked the lessons on magic much more than Regina. He taught them together, but Regina was too nervous to do much. She would produce a stream of water between her hands, and then jump at seeing it there, and the water would disappear. Snow would create an arching fountain that turned into a geiser as it increased in strength, she would turn balls of light into fire and throw them at trees, for Rumplestiltskin to put out.

All the while that Snow performed magic, her cheeks gleamed with her smile and her eyes danced with light.

Regina would look on with her arms folded, and poorly concealed resentment on her face. Thankfully, when the child was performing magic, she was blind to any of Regina's somewhat biased criticisms.

"Can people be controlled by objects?" Snow asked him one day, tilting her head in curiosity.

"Why of course Dearie, people can be controlled in all sorts of ways. Why'd you ask? Did you have something, _specific _in mind?"

"There was a ring, that Cora was wearing, the night that...well the night that we left the castle."

"And?"

"And I think..." Snow thought for a minute; produced a ball of light in her hands and let it float up into the air like a bubble. It popped. "I think she was controlling me with it." She said looking at Rumplestiltskin again.

Regina's eyebrows pulled together in shock and confusion. "What do you mean, Snow?" she asked.

"I don't know what the ring did exactly. I think it was trying to get me to tell the truth, and so I said the opposite of that, but somehow Cora knew that I was lying. That must have been the ring's power...The ring was trying to get me to tell the truth, yet because I said the opposite, and because the ring was also able to tell Cora if the person was able to defy it."

Regina had to wonder if Snow had made up the story, made up the ring. She reminded her so much of her mother lately, that she found it hard to trust anything that she innocently said, unsure if it was a manipulation or not.

"It sounds like you've seen the double edged sword Cora has made herself." Rumplestilskin said. "Or I should say, a rounded edged one." He gave a little laugh. "You see, Cora's ring is very special because it is something like a living being. She is able to feed it hearts, and with each heart she feeds it, the ring posses a new power. Cora doesn't always know what that power will be, but it seems that unfortunately, for you at least, she was able to have it work out quite well for her this time. It doesn't always go that way though, it can occasionally, backfire on her." He gave another little laugh. "What, may I ask, did she convince you to reveal?"

Snow looked down. "That Regina was my mother. Because, what came out of my mouth, was that I _wasn't _her biological daughter. I suppose that would have sounded suspicious to anyone though. I just, I didn't want to say what the ring wanted me to say, which would have been even worse, the truth, that I _was. _"

"Well Dearie, not to fear." Rumplestiltskin said. "Soon you will have power, and be able to make any weapon you desire. The fact that you were able to resist the ring at all, shows that you are already, naturally quite powerful."

"I don't want to make a weapon like that." Snow said weakly. "I don't want to be like her..."

Sympathy welled in Regina's heart as she watched Snow scuff her pretty shoe against the bark. The poor girl, she must be in mourning still of her father. Unless that too, was some kind of a manipulation...Regina gave herself an internal shake. It couldn't be, could it?

"Weapons of defense, can also, of course be made, if that is what pleases you," Rumplestiltskin said. "Almost anything actually, can be used as a defensive mechanism, against an offensive one. It depends entirely on your intention. "

Regina let out a sigh.

"What is it my dear?" Rumplestiltskin said to Regina, noticing her expression, the way her eyebrows were knit together.

"It's just-" Regina wrung her hands. "Magic!" Her hands flew apart in an explosive gesture which froze in midair. "You say that it can be used...as a defensive mechanism. But that's not really true, is it? Because if there was no magic at all to begin with, there would be nothing to defend! I'm just, I'm sorry, I'm having a hard time with all of this..."

Rumplestiltskin gave his little laugh. "I know you are dearie, but not to fear. I am here to help you with that. Snow, be a dear and go fetch me a dandelion will you?"

She smiled at him and nodded, running to go get it when he stopped her.

"But not, the kind that already has all of the little wishes on it, if you know what I mean."

Snow simply nodded with her smile and then kept on.

Regina watched her wearily. "Snow! Don't go too far!" She called.

Rumplestiltskin waved her off. "She'll be fine."

"What do you need a dandelion for?" Regina asked.

"You'll soon see." Rumplestiltskin said.

Regina sighed, and adjusted her blue cloak absently. It was a light color, and made of silk. There were definitely perks to living with a magician. For one thing she no longer smelled like a thousand different types of tree bark from sleeping on the ground all the time, and she could do her hair differently every day if she wanted too. She should get Rumplestilskin to teach her how to do that with magic. Though the thought of asking him that made her feel both fear, for it would possibly anger him, and amusement, it would be hilarious if he would actually be willing to waste his time teaching her something like that. Maybe he would if Snow asked though. Regina could manage their hair fine without magic though. She had two small pieces of it pulled from her face and into braids around the sides of the top of her head and tied together at the back, the rest hung down to her shoulders and framed her face. She had done Snow's hair in a matching style this morning.

Snow skipped back with the dandelions in hand, her dark red cloak bounding along with her.

"I got three!" she said stopping in front of Rumplestiltskin cheerfully.

Rumplestilskin smiled, but Regina could tell from experience with her mother, that the curved edges of his smile was the gleeful look of a magician about to perform their trick, cruel or otherwise.

"Which one has the longest stem?" Rumplestiltskin asked her.

"This one," Snow said, raising the flower higher than the rest.

Rumplestiltskin plucked it from her fingers.

He handed the flower to Regina, and adjusted it in her grip so that the flower was brushing against the inside of her wrist, and the stem was sticking outward.

"Now, are you ready for what you have to do?"

Regina blinked and gave a nod.

"Turn the flower into a wooden wand, and save your daughter with the magical water," Rumplestiltskin said, and with a wave of his arm, Snow went up in flames.

Regina panicked. "Snow!"

"Mom!?" Snow called. The flames were see-through so Regina could see the look of terror on Snow's face.

Terror and pain, but not as much as she would feel were she encased in real flames. Regina suspected that they were magical. But that didn't mean they couldn't kill. Sweat poured from Regina's brow, as she turned all of her concentration to the stem.

Snow was concentrating too. After a moment the look of terror and pain left her face, she closed her eyes and scrunched up her eyebrows and cheeks, concentrating on something. Regina suspected, she was using magic to somehow combat the pain and the effects of the fire.

She would not let her daughter melt away. "I can't!" She cried out. The dandelion would not change shape.

"You have to believe in yourself dearie," Rumplestiltskin said.

Regina looked at the flames in desperation, let go of the dandelion with one hand, and shot a stream of water at her daughter with one hand.

"No!" Rumplestiltskin siad.

The flames around Snow rose higher where the water hit.

"Do as I instructed, use the stem."

Regina held his gaze desperately, then looked back at the dandelion. She looked at her daughter, whose hair was melting away. Red cuts were starting to open up on her arms, as the flames began to remove patches of skin.

She closed her eyes, and she was in the cave, and she was pushing her daughter out of her with all of her might. She focused that energy onto the stem, and slowly, and as painfully as if she were giving birth again, the dandelion turned to wood.

"Good! Good Dearie!" Rumplestiltskin exclaimed.

Regina pointed the wand at Snow, and thought about how much she loved her. A fountain of water sprouted from the wand, abruptly bent into a sheet and waterfalled over all of the fire.

Snow stood there, shivering, tears rolling down her cheeks, eyes large, the ends of her hair burnt, some locks of hair burnt almost up to the scalp, her arms bleeding.

She stumbled forward into Regina's arms, but before she made it there, she tripped over a root, and as she tripped, Rumplestiltskin waved his arm again and she was made anew, as if her body had never been burnt by the fire. Regina moved forward and caught her. Snow cried into Regina's gown and laughed in relief that the pain was gone.

Regina held her, and stared at the ground, her expression stoic. She couldn't glare at Rumplestiltskin, Cora had taught her that much.

"Now," Rumplestiltskin said with a smile. "Why don't you change the other two dandelions to wish blowing flowers?"

He bent and handed a flower to Snow, who took it meekly, her face like a babies that hadn't yet learned how to smile.

Regina took her flower. She swished her hand once and the yellow poofed into gray. She blew the dusty seeds out over the bark, wishing for Snow to never be harmed again.

The child's hand was trembling. She couldn't change her flower.

"Here," Regina said gently, pulling it from Snow's finger's.

She changed the flower, and then handed it back to Snow. Snow blew the seeds into the ground.

~R~S~R~S~

That night, Regina clutched Snow to her chest and they shared the same bed. As soon as Rumplestiltskin had left them alone, they had retreated to their room and glued themselves to each other. Snow seemed to be trying to pull herself closer, as if she were trying to sink back into Regina's womb.

"I don't ever want to have to do that again," Snow whispered.

"I know," Regina said, stroking her hair.

"When will we leave?" Snow said.

"At the first opportunity. When it is safe to do so." Regina said.

Though she sensed, that leaving Rumplestiltskin, would not be as easy as calling on him simply by stating his name.

**Author's Note: So I didn't completely abandon this story! Thanks so much for the reviews, they really keep me going! :) **


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